Six Questions
by DanielFactoid
Summary: [complete]Missing scene for TOW the Embryos. Monica tries to win back the apartment. Oneshot.


"Six Questions"

Genre: General, Humor

Rated: K+

Pairing(s): no definite ones, but there may be a hint of Mondler

Summary: Missing scene during "TOW Phoebe's Uterus". How Monica tried to get their apartment back from Joey and Chandler, but instead lost their mattresses.

AN: I just saw this episode for the second time and I continue to love it. There is so much Mondler in this episode (I still find it funny that no one really knows what Chandler does for work… "something with a briefcase", as Rachel would say), and I had to write in the missing scene. Also- I don't know if any of the trivia about Joey and Chan is true. Unbetaed, sorry for any mistakes.

Disclaimer: I don't own "Friends" or anything to do with it. Sure wish I owned Chandler.

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"Alright, you two- what can we do to get the apartment back?" Monica demanded as she burst into the apartment that was soon to be her own.

Chandler looked up from a bowl of ice cream as he sat at the counter. He grinned at Monica, "Absolutely nothing."

"Come on, Rachel's about to kill me, just give me a chance!" Monica cried, and Joey appeared from his room and sat next to Chandler at the counter, "I'll get the apartment back if I win, and you guys can have whatever you want if you win."

Joey and Chandler exchanged a glance, "We want your mattresses."

Monica was taken aback, but agreed anyway, "Fine! What's the game?"

"How about this?" Chandler began, "We ask you six questions, three each about each other. If you get any of them wrong, we get your mattresses. If you answer all of them right, then we switch apartments back."

"That's not fair! That doesn't give me any way to trick you out of the apartment!"

"Take it or leave it," Joey said.

"I take it," Monica said grudgingly, "Ask your stupid questions."

"OK, I'll go first," Joey said. After a moment, he asked, "Where was the first place I ever had sex?"

"Your parents' bed!"

Joey nodded and Chandler slowly turned to his roommate, "Um, ew!"

"What? I only had a single bed," Joey explained.

"Who cares, who cares, next question!"

"Hmmm…." Joey thought for a few more seconds, and then his face brightened, "If I could be any animal, what would I want to be?"

"What kind of a question is that?" Monica said angrily.

"You're giving up?" Chandler asked hopefully.

"No!" she retorted. "A… a…. a duck-billed platypus!"

"Damn it!" Joey shouted. "I never told anyone that!"

"YES!" Monica called out joyfully, and then faced Joey again, "Ask your last question, Tribbiani, and prepare for slow death!"

"Uhmm…" Joey mumbled, and looked fearfully into Monica's face. After a few minutes, he began, "Uhm… which one of you three did Chandler li-"

Chandler turned bright red and clasped a hand over Joey's mouth, "That's not a question about you, Joe!"

"I couldn't think of anything else about me!" Joey whined as Chandler lowered his hand. With a sigh, Chandler whispered something into Joey's ear. "Right! OK- who was the first person I ever slept with?"

Monica bit her lip for a second, thinking; then she shouted, "You don't remember her name, but she was a virgin before that night!"

"How the _hell _did you know that?" Chandler asked in amazement.

Monica stuck out her tongue, "My secret! You're up, Bing!"

Chandler sat and stared at Monica, wondering what she couldn't know about him (other than his job). Slowly, he said, "What kind of ice cream did I eat after I broke up with Janice for the first time?"

Monica rolled her eyes at the easiness of the question, "Chocolate chip cookie dough."

"Correct," Chandler snapped. He thought for a moment, thinking of trivia about himself that Monica wouldn't know, "Did I have sex for first time _before _or _after _Ross had sex for the first time?"

Monica thought for a moment, and then said, "After!"

Chandler slammed a fist on the counter and Joey gave him an unbelieving look, "_Dude_, that's pretty sad-"

"I know, I know," Chandler muttered, and then sat up straight, looking into Monica's eyes, "Last question. You get it right, we stay here. You get it wrong, we get your apartment and mattresses. You think you're gonna win?"

"You bet you _ass_ I'm going to win, Ms. Bong!" Monica said, leaning in and listening closely.

"OK, final question…" Chandler took a deep breath and asked the only thing that she couldn't possibly get right, "Which one of you three did I used to have a crush on?"

Monica closed her eyes and took a guess, seeing as she had no clue, "Me?"

"Nope, that's wrong!" Joey shouted.

"Wrong, wrong, wrong! We get the apartment and the mattresses!"

"Noooooooo!" Monica moaned, and Chandler, grinning, opened the door for her. Recognizing defeat, she dragged herself out of the apartment. Suddenly, she stopped, "Wait, then who was-"

"Out, out, out!" Chandler said and shoved her into the hallway, closing the door and turning to Joey, who was eating some of Chandler's ice cream, "Can you believe this! An awesome apartment and comfortable mattresses!"

"I know!" Joey said excitedly, and then frowned, "But don't you feel bad that you just totally lied to her?"

"You know, I thought I would…" Chandler said, and then grinned, "But the guilt's been washed out by the ultimate bachelor pad!"

Joey high-fived Chandler, who grabbed his ice cream and ate it, feeling slightly guilty- but mainly extremely happy.

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Something short to make me smile. You like or hate? Review then, because it makes my day. (btw- thanks for all the reviews on other oneshots)


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